thanks.

A Mexican turtle trainer once told me that being a human was expensive. I agree, being human is expensive; it is also mind-numbingly difficult. Most of the time all I am looking for is clarity, or a push in the right direction. Then when all the treading water pays off and clarity comes to you, or a good friend or good book pulls you out of the mess of yourself. You surface but it is just for a moment and maybe just your left eye, which was bent by astigmatism somewhere in your development, and you look and look into a universe of crisp clarity and see that you were being an ass – again. And so you sink to the bottom of your tank like those damned Mexican turtles and wait for the neurosis to pull self-loathing covers up to your chin. But then, a friend (usually the same asshole who handed you the flashlight that originally lit up your mess) knocks on your door and hands you some hope and a few pretty dresses to borrow. This is the sort of friend that finds you milling around the kitchen with an empty cup in one hand and some coffee beans in a the other, watches for a bit as you clap the two together, and then just as you are about to throw the cup across the room and just chew on the coffee beans your friend takes the beans and the cup and puts the kettle on.